when youre laying down and your pet walks across your internal organs and youre like OW FUCK and they dont even care they just keep standing on your spleen like its their job

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i envy people that come up with witty comebacks on the spot because i’m gonna need at least a 3 day notice 

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i hate when people take unexpected pictures of me  image

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man i wish homophobic people were actually AFRAID of gay people like could you imagine having the power to strike fear in peoples hearts with your homo

"If I do not have one trazillion dollars on my doorstep by noon tomorrow, I swear I will KISS THIS WOMAN on the MOUTH in front of your children.”

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Omfg i LOVE fall/winter outfits, i can’t wait! 
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American Horror Story: First Look at Freak Show Cast Art (©) Kathy Bates as the Bearded Lady. Michael Chiklis as the strong man. A two-headed Sarah Paulson. Sword eaters and oh so much more.
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That look ur mom gives u when u embarrass her in public but she can’t kill u yet


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